Isabella
Thank you to MoorMum Chris from Yeadon for sharing her story.
Isabella was born in a great rush at 3.03am on 26 October 2008 at Leeds General Infirmary. I’d gone 5 days over my due date and was getting really fed up. I’d had no signs of anything, no practice contractions, no show, nothing. I did have a dreadful cold, and sore throat which just wouldn’t go away though. On the Friday my husband had some bad news that his Grandpa had died which was very upsetting for both of us. I think that must have kicked things off because at 4am on Saturday morning I started to get a few twinges, every 15 mins or so and enough to wake me up. I got up, had something to eat and tried to relax a bit. My husband got up at about 7 and helped me fiddle about with the TENS machine. A few small electric shocks later and we got the hang of it. By about 9am the contractions were about 8 mins apart so I thought I’d call the hospital and check when they wanted us to go in. The midwife told me to wait until they were about 3 minutes apart, so I thought we’d be off before long. I called my parents to pack the car up and hit the road as they live nearly 2 hours away and wanted to be around for the birth. So we were all ready to go, just had to wait for the contractions to get closer. And then everything stopped. I was gutted. I’d dragged my poor parents over for no reason, and I was back to sitting around, drinking gaviscon from the bottle and waiting for something to happen.
That evening, while we were mid Strictly Come Dancing, it all started again, and fast. This time it wasn’t just twinges, it was full on lean against a wall, breathing hard, low down pain. For me it wasn’t like period pain, it was more like very very bad constipation. I made it through tea (lamb and spuds followed by lemon tart – the last decent food I would eat for days!) and by 9pm the contractions were coming every 5 minutes. They were strong but I managed with the TENS machine until about 11.30 pm when they were varying from 5 minutes to 2 minutes apart. I called the hospital and the midwife told me that I should come in when I could bear the pain no longer. We lasted another 30 minutes and I decided it was time. Thankfully at that time of night there was very little traffic on the roads and it was easy to park in the Clarendon Wing (one of my main concerns had been if we had to go in during the rush hour!). The contractions had slowed a bit by this point, so I was convinced we’d be sent home. We didn’t bother bringing my bag in, which was well packed with all that stuff you’re told will help (music, birthing ball, wheatie bags etc.). So off we toddled to the delivery suite, the labour ward being shut at that time, with only my handbag, notes and a bottle of water.
During previous scans there had been an indication of a heart problem, so while booking us in the midwife decided to monitor the heart before examining me which took her about 30 mins. My contractions slowed a lot more as I was lying flat on back. When she finally got to examine me at about 1am, I was only 3-4cm dilated, so I was only just in established labour. I really thought I was ready to pop, so this was a bit disappointing. I was starting to get hungry by this point, so she sent us off for a wander to the vending machine to see if the contractions would get going again. And boy did they get going. I made it as far as the cafe and spent a few minutes swinging on some bar stools, then we knew we had to get back to the delivery suite sharpish. It felt like the longest walk I’ve ever done, every few minutes clinging to the wall and screaming. When we got back to the suite the midwife found us a room and we sat down to talk about drugs. My plan had been to go with the flow but to avoid pethidine as I’d heard it can cause problems for the baby. When the midwife told me that it could be another 7 or 8 hours and it might be worth thinking about having some just to get some kip, I was ready to have all the drugs available to me, including an epidural. I wanted her to examine me again as I was sure things had moved on a lot faster than we’d thought. She said she wasn’t really meant to examine me that often, only once every 2 hours, but it was becoming pretty clear that things were moving on apace. She gave me some gas and air, which was fantastic, and then got me up on the bed to have a quick look. I’d dilated to 5-6 cm in the space of about 30 minutes. It all got a bit business-like after that. My husband legged it to get my bag out of the car so I could change into my nightie and the midwife got all kitted up. It was far too late for any drugs by this stage. At one point I was desperate for a pee so the midwife let me waddle off to the loo. I had a massive contraction while I was in there, and without the gas and air I did scream very very loudly. When I opened the loo door it seemed that the whole of the staff were outside, thinking I’d given birth in the toilet. I made it back to the room and the sweet laughing gas before the next one came, thankfully. The contractions kept coming thick and fast and then the time came when I had an overwhelming urge to push. It really is amazing how the body just knows what to do. When she finally came out I really thought I was going to split in two from the pain, but then it was all over and there she was lying on the bed under me. The midwife tried to get me look at the baby to see which we’d got, but I’d taken off my specs and couldn’t see that far! We’d been totally convinced we were having a boy all along so it was a real surprise to find that the requisite bits weren’t there. The midwife made my husband cut the cord, and there she was – the most beautiful little baby girl in the world. I burst into tears and it was the most amazing feeling in my life.
I’d had to push 3 times, taking all of 13 minutes. Bearing in mind the clocks had changed that night (very confusing for all of us, midwife included!), I had spent only 3 hours in established labour, which I later heard described as a precipitate labour. The midwife called it a textbook delivery and I was really chuffed with myself having managed it all on TENS and gas and air. However, things took a turn for the worse when the placenta wouldn’t budge. All manner of people came in to have a go but after an hour there was still no sign so I was taken into theatre, given a spinal block and the placenta was manually removed. I had also suffered a second degree tear and an abrasion so I was in theatre for about an hour being stitched up while my husband got to cuddle our baby. We’d only chosen boy names so she was just called baby while all this went on. The midwife was very keen we should name her so we rattled through the few girls names we’d thought of and Isabella was the only one she didn’t wail at. Before we knew it the midwife had written out her name tag and that was that! Fortunately it was our favourite too and it suits her well.
We then had an uncomfortable and difficult few days on the post natal ward before we went home. We had a lot of problems with feeding as Izzy hadn’t been too keen and wasn’t very good at latching on. The midwife had noted she had a tongue tie, like me, but no one connected this to the difficulties we had feeding. I had lost my voice almost entirely by this point because of my cold and was feeling very vulnerable. I didn’t push for help like I should have; I just thought it would sort itself out. We made it home on the Tuesday evening but by the Friday morning Izzy was massively dehydrated, had lost nearly 20% of her body weight, and thanks to the queried heart defect (which thankfully turned out to be nothing) we found ourselves in an ambulance with the blue lights going on our way back to LGI. We then spent another 6 nights on the children’s ward with her being fed down a tube and attempting to re-establish feeding. It wasn’t until she was a week old that a very experienced midwife diagnosed that the tongue tie was the problem all along. She had it snipped and she then managed to feed properly. Unfortunately my supply hadn’t been stimulated properly so we had to supplement with formula. We limped on breastfeeding until she was 7 weeks but she then developed reflux so it became impossible to continue. I really struggled to stop breastfeeding even though it was the right thing to do for us. She is now fully formula fed and a beautiful thriving 6 month old with a smile to warm the hardest of hearts.
Top Tips
The body knows exactly what it’s doing during labour and birth – don’t fight it and don’t think too hard about what is happening.
There is little you can do to prepare for labour, other than getting your head in the right place. But if packing all the nice things in your bag helps you get there, then do it. Just don’t obsess about getting the right facial spray or massage oil, as you really won’t care when the time comes.
Timing contractions using the stopwatch function on a mobile phone is much easier than using a watch and pen and paper
Drinking straws are the simplest but most useful items you can have in your bag for labour. And someone to hold the cup/bottle of water is pretty essential too.
Paper knickers are ghastly, as are maternity pads. You can always buy a few really cheap big knickers for the first day or so and chuck them out if they get too grim to deal with. And Kotex night-time pads are way more comfy than the maternity ones at first, and the normal slimline pads are really all you need after that.
A major part of your stay on a post natal ward is to establish feeding – and no matter how quickly other new mums come and go, if you want to breastfeed it is absolutely essential to stay put until you are 100% confident the baby can latch on and feed properly.
Post natal wards are busy places, and the staff are hopelessly overstretched. If you need help or anything else, don’t wait to be asked, speak up!
If you would like to contact Chris to discuss her story or ask any questions, please contact us.
